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musings

September 2020 Picks

Fellow introverts.. I need advice. I have a neighbour who passes my house 1000 times a day. How many times am I supposed to greet him? I have already said good morning, good morning again, how are you, how are things, are you breathing, etc. I have also exhausted the kawaida topics like corona imezidi, mvua nayo po, uchumi ni mbaya, etc. What do I tell him next?

Posted by Mark M. Chetambe on Saturday, 26 September 2020

I have always imagined that I am the ultimate authority in my kingdom. The only centre of power. The king of the jungle, with full executive power over all the people, cockroaches, rats, mosquitoes, plates and cups. Until yesterday. I was taking hot tea in a smooth brown mug when I became absentminded as usual. The chinaware slipped between my fingers, hit the floor and broke into a thousand pieces. Some of the hot tea got into the marginalised parts of the Rift Valley. Let us ignore my pain for now. This happened in the full glare of our three year old Inspector General. The guy ran off at a speed that made me to suspect that Usain Bolt might be related to us. I heard him report the incident with the kind of efficacy that Noordin Haji, Moreno Ocampo and one Kinoti would be envious of: “Mum, baba amevunja kikombe yako!” We must review the constitution. This devolution thing has taken power into alternative heads, causing a political earthquake in the jungle. Can’t a man be free to break a few things in peace?

Posted by Mark M. Chetambe on Sunday, 20 September 2020

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